Enjoy Retirement, but Don’t Spend My Inheritance
EDIT: Due to brain damage, I forget to mention the winner of the personal finance book is Sandy K. Sandy I will put the book in the mail today, thanks for entering!
“Inheritance is the practice of passing on property, titles, debts, and obligations upon the death of an individual. It has long played an extremely important role in human societies.” Wikipedia
Several times while listening to a personal finance radio show I’ve heard callers call in about their inheritance from parents who are not even dead yet. It amazes me how some people feel a sense of entitlement just because they breath air, like they did something truly remarkable to deserve their inheritance.
I thought an inheritance was a gift and not a right.
This just got me thinking, how do you feel about what your parents have accumulated, if anything? Would it be ‘okay’ if they left you with nothing or would you feel like you’ve been jipped.
Do you ever wonder if your parents are spending your inheritance?
In: Money · Tagged with: gift, inheritance, Money, parents
on June 2, 2008 at 2:00 am
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Haha, This reminds me of a law class I had in college. The Professor asked “If you give your parents an expensive gift, are you entitled to get it back when they die?”
A lot of students said “Yes”
The professor disagreed. She said if you expect to get it back, than you should “loan” it to them, not give it to them.
I completely agreed. And I agree with what you’re saying, “inheritance is a gift, not a right”.
Barbara Swaffords last blog post..Those Are Fighting Words
on June 2, 2008 at 9:27 am
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I absolutely agree with this post! Inheritance is a gift. I doubt we’ll get much more than a few mementos from my Mum, and that’s fine. If she has anything to leave, then it should go to whoever she wishes it to go to, whether that’s an obscure cousin’s youngest daughter or the local cat’s home. There’s no way I’d be wrangling over money when her time comes. Good grief, I can’t offhand think of anything more ugly and grasping than the proprietorial behaviour of people who consider a parent’s property ‘theirs’ even before they pass on!
Some of the nastiest behaviour I have witnessed has been after the death of a ‘loved one’ and has been driven by just this sense of entitlement. A member of our own family evicted his elderly, widowed and wheelchair-bound grandmother so he could sell the house from under her. She had lived with his father (her son) and he had failed to make a will. Everyone in the family knew that he wished her to be allowed to stay put until her death, but when this maggot inherited everything by default, he made her move to a crappy old folks’ home. It’s not even as if his father was poor.
Gah.
on June 2, 2008 at 2:48 pm
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I cant even imagine planning on ‘how to spend’ my parents money after they die? YIKES….what is wrong with people? Maybe they need to focus on making their own money. sheesh
meleah rebeccahs last blog post..Because Its Not Really A ‘Party’ Unless The Paramedics Arrive.
on June 2, 2008 at 4:42 pm
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I used to resent the fact that my alcoholic mother basically pissed the millions my father left us away on booze, gambling, bad loans, etc., but I realized your point some time ago & got over it. When she passed away, I ended up with enough for a downpayment for a house, anyway. Better than a kick in the @$$.
Lanas last blog post..And the Winners Are…
on June 2, 2008 at 7:01 pm
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bless your heart and I need it for so many reasons sk
sandys last blog post..No Way – Impossible – It can NOT be Monday Already !!!!!!
on June 2, 2008 at 8:15 pm
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I’m pretty sure my mom is buying shoes with my inheritance. So I’ll be inheriting lots of sandals with heels. lol
Corrinas last blog post..Does This Look Comfortable?
on June 2, 2008 at 10:02 pm
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Thanks for checking on me when I wasn’t posting! I’m back!
Letsbitchs last blog post..Pringles Man Dies
on June 3, 2008 at 3:25 am
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Hi Natural – you could get me going here – I think it’s pathetic when people see their parents’ money as their own. They don’t feel strong enough to make their own money, I suppose. I can’t relate at all to thinking like that. YUK! (I have a friend who is a bit like that, so I am pre-annoyed about it.)
Robins last blog post..Paul’s letter to the Corinthians
on June 3, 2008 at 7:15 am
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That’s true Barbara, loan and not give. There’s less stress when you give whatever away, you don’t worry about getting it back. At least I don’t, but loaning things, you wonder if you will ever see it again.
Jay, not with everyone, but some kids expect their parents to take care of them forever, even in death. I think they’ve done enough, time to fly.
Meleah, me neither….for whatever reasons people may have, some expect it (inheritance). Some lose sight of what, at least I think it is, a gift. Gifts are unexpected.
Lana, my sober father is probably pissing away everything he got from his mother or ever saved and I know he’s not leaving us anything – he’s selfish – My mother on the other hand has always given to her children, so I tell her not to leave ME anything, to go and enjoy her money, travel. She worked hard for it and she taught me well enough. She left me something that can’t be spent, lost, or stolen….a pretty darn good example and a hard act to follow. I’ll be just fine without her money. Of course, she is leaving me/us something, but that’s because she doesn’t listen, but if there were nothing materially, she left plenty in other ways.
Sandy, enjoy the book. My princess picks the winners and she picked entry two.
Corrina, lol. Hey what size are those shoes?
Let’sB – You’re alive! Thanks for letting me know.
Robin, It’s a little sad, when some forget all that their parents have done for them in the past….it’s still not enough. They do feel entitled just because they breath. I don’t get it either. Of course most parents will take care of their kid(s) and leave them something, but it does get to me when it’s expected and even fought over.
Naturals last blog post..Enjoy Retirement, but Don’t Spend My Inheritance
on June 5, 2008 at 8:11 pm
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I agree: inheritance is a gift — you’re not “owed” anything from your parents. That said, I almost cried when my sort of wealthy-ish aunt told me she’d fallen for a scam artist and gave him $8,000.
JD at I Do Thingss last blog post..I Got a Kitten so you don’t have to
on June 5, 2008 at 9:15 pm
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Amen! The greatest gift my parents could leave me would be a legacy of life well lived. Mom’s smart, though–she keeps a list of the items that mean a lot to each of us, so that each of us will inherit the things that are most meaningful. Keeps money and fairness out of it.
Saras last blog post..Dishing the Dirt, On Simplicity Style
on June 5, 2008 at 10:11 pm
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Do I ever wonder if my parents are spending my inheritance? Not really. I think they’ve given me more than enough as is. Plus, I try not to think of them dying anytime soon.
However as my mom is a state employee, I am entitled to her retirement benefits when she passes away. I’m not in any hurry to get those benefits, but with the way my state does things sometimes, I wonder if they’ll hold true to their word.
TOPolks last blog post..Separated At Birth?
on June 6, 2008 at 11:54 am
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JD – $8,000! Ouch.
Sara, that’s nice of your mom to do. Better than fighting.
TOPolk enough IS enough, but not everyone sees it that way.
Naturals last blog post..5 Random and Quirky Things No One Knows About Me
on June 7, 2008 at 10:22 am
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My hubby & I have been looked after by my mother (in lots of ways) as we have gone through some really hard times.
Just recently, things have turned the corner with a vengeance, and it’s nice to know that we can return a little of her financial help by supporting her now.
I dread to think of the day when my mum won’t be here to hug us all. Money won’t bring her back then, and I feel really sorry for those who care more for that than their own parents.
Jane @ Kidzaramas last blog post..FPFF ~ How We Relax At Our House
on August 20, 2008 at 5:50 am
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Hi Jane, sorry about the delay in responding. Glad things turned around for you and you’re able to help mom. It’s a beautiful thing to do when you can.
on August 21, 2008 at 1:10 am
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I find it repulsive that anyone would count on or expect an inheritance. My comment is that the lazy bast-ds go out and make their own fortune and stop sucking on the parental teet.
estate planning’s last blog post..Retirement Manager from Morningstar Simplifies 401k Management
on August 21, 2008 at 7:14 am
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Well there are some that expect an inheritance as if it were their birth right…maybe a long time ago, birth rights were the norm, but hello….go make your own, as if raising you somehow weren’t enough.
Thanks for stopping by.
on December 29, 2008 at 1:20 am
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If parents were not given anything from their parents, or they have nothing, inheritance is probably not a concern for most kids, and no they do not deserve an inheritance.
However, the baby boomer generation (probably the most selfish parents in history) inherit an inheritance from their parents (usually real estate), because that’s what that generation did back then, which is now worth a fortune, were given the worlds resources on a plater and took everything they wanted leaving very little behind, with most resources scarce now, and most things worth an arm and a leg to purchase now, and the environment a mess with a big bill attached to clean it up, and now selfishly leaving no inheritance to future generations. How do they repay what they were unselfishly given from past generations or the world?
Sorry, people will be remembered for their selfishness, if they were given much, and leave little or nothing behind for others.
I was not given anything, but head knowledge. I don’t mind working for my own, don’t need a hand out. A gift is just that, a gift and not a right. If someone is fortunate enough to receive something like an inheritance great, I just hate to hear people speak of it like they own it or are so entitled. True, people will be remembered for their selfishness, but it is theirs to keep or do whatever with it.